So, like some people, who’ll seek for advice from friends, or some from horoscope or from family members…
I tried the Yahoo! Answers…
Well… maybe because I do spend plenty of time online…
(haha, I’m like the “fujoshi”, female version of “otaku”)
I posted the above question online… with the description below:-
I have a colleague who's so 2-face, she's nice and suck up to the management, but she bullies peers, like me, like the others, when you confront her, she'll first denied everything she's said and if it doesn't work, she'll start crying and tell you that, after working for so many years, this is the first time she feel so sad. But, she lies constantly in front of boss, for eg. she likes to eavesdrop, likes to peep into other's work, likes to mind other's business, but if there's another 3rd or 4th party around, she'll deny all these and say, she's very professional and do not mind other's business.
In addition to that, she constantly boast of her own capability, but when problem arise, she keeps quiet and refuse to say anything, as she's scared that she'll be blamed
she puts words into others mouth to scold another person, for eg. she'll tell the public, A said B is stupid and lousy, and in fact, these are her own words, she boss others to do the work so if something wrong, she's safe
The interesting thing is… I actually get quite a good number of “advice”, I mean, a genuine one…
Ah… I know… I’m not alone…
Below are the answers, and the first one is what I “voted” as the best answer…
A1: I do my job and pretend they do not exit. I am careful never to say anything I do not want repeated and in a subtle way, I let them know they are not fooling me with their BS.
Let her cry and do not give in to her or feel sorry for her. That is her method of getting out of trouble. It sound like she is a pathological liar and you can never beat those people at their games because they will lie no matter what.
They act like that to get attention, so ignoring them is the best punishment you can give me. Just pretend you do not care. I would not even bother to bring up something they say. I would act like I did not know anything. I would just speak to them like to say hello and that would be it. They hate to be ignored. They will keep digging the hole deeper trying to get your attention but eventually they are in over their heads.
A2: Avoid this person as much as possible. There are more of them out there than one would like to think...just part of life. These people usually "hang themselves," if you know what I mean. People who lie constantly, for example, eventually spin a web so complicated that even they can't remember what they've said and this ends up getting them in trouble. I wouldn't do anything...just pay attention to YOUR morals and YOUR code of conduct and leave the creep alone.
A3: I know exactly how you feel! This past year, I endured the same type of treatment from a coworker. I don’t need to go into a lengthy description of her behavior –I will just say that she is poison. I tried everything to make her… like me, respect me, and stop treating me badly, …and to stop taking credit for work she did not do (I was livid that others seemed to be fooled by her) until one day it all just ‘clicked.’
The answer was to simply give her no more notice than the …passing clouds in the sky.
The opposite of love is not hate, but rather indifference. I learned to be polite; if she looked in my direction; I would smile (slightly) and go on about my daily responsibilities. I know this sounds like a reaction to her behavior, like one who feigns not caring, but my indifference is sincere, I really, really do not care about her or her life. I no longer worry myself about her ‘show-boating’ attention seeking, and the worst of all, being given credit and respect that I knew she did not deserve. I learned that I could not control these things, and that any other person (who was good of heart) saw her manipulative personality.
So, my advice is for you to carefully think this through –let her live her life as she sees fit and don’t take it personally. Focus on what is important in your life. Begin a new hobby, contact an old friend, plan a trip -anything to make You happy. <<
You really don’t need anyone else’s existence to interfere with your own goals and dreams and life fulfillment. :)
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